Literalist: The glass contains about 50% water.
Nihilist: The glass doesn’t matter.
Anarchist: The glass is now full of piss.
Absurdist: the glass is now upside-down without spilling the water.
Me: I don’t know who’s glass this is so it’s going in the sink.
And set them on fire when they can’t work in the gulag anymore.
When I was that age I’d rather have died in the jungle. Not so much these days. It’s just not worth dealing with the mosquitoes.
I don’t know world news banned me because how dare I be angry at people in politics and wish that bad things would happen to them, and 196 band me because? Probably because I hate furries and dated to say so, but they never gave me a reason and I don’t care.
See this is part of why I’m an atheist. I refuse to believe any God exists that’s dumber than Gary Gygax.
Insurance CEO: We don’t see a necessity for a replacement house.
See that’s how you get people to like you more. Not whatever the hell social media CEOs keep doing.
You know how fiberglass is made up of resin and slivers of glass? Well asbestos also forms into slivers…
Welcome to America, where you are free to fuck off and die. Here’s your bill.
Isn’t this the premise of The Langoliers?
You can sometimes tell when someone is suicidal by certain warning signs…
So given this example, does Twitter X XxX_DOGE42069_XxX.com censor posts about soup?
I’ve had this happen at places that then refuse to just adjust the next bill. The IRS is notorious for that actually. What’s that, you owe $3? You better fucking pay up, there’s no way we’re just going to take it out of your next year’s taxes.
They were lost due to a rounding error.
“Free speech.” Fuck Spez and his sycophants.
Most euros have no goddamn idea just how huge the US actually is.
Q: Why don’t Americans travel abroad? A: That’s a 12+ hour flight I can’t afford to go somewhere I don’t speak the language. I barely live paycheck to paycheck if I’m lucky.
Q: Why don’t Americans speak other languages? A: I can drive for up to and over 1,000 miles in almost any direction and everybody still speaks English. The exception is most of Mexico. And some of Quebec, but that’s because some of them are just assholes.
Q: Is America really that big? A: All of Europe could fit inside the continental 48 states alone, with room left over for desert. We have literally every biome here, more vacation options than you could fit into a human lifetime of just visiting them all, and we import all the best stuff from everywhere else. There’s no practical reason to leave the country, and we don’t have to mess with border crossings in-country. Until recent years we didn’t need passports at all, in country. Now the TSA demands them (or the Real ID equivalent) for some security theater political bullshit reason, but that’s flying domestically only.
That’s a look that says “please just stop and go away.” The girl’s, that is. The guy’s look says “I wonder what human meat tastes like.”
Hey, if it works it works.
Tell us you’re Canadian without telling us you’re Canadian.