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Cake day: July 2nd, 2023

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  • For the record, I’m basing this on the movie, idk if the comic is fundamentally different or mostly aesthetically so.

    The main difference was he didn’t nuke various cities, but created some giant mutant psychic squid and teleported it on New York, killing millions (somehow, between the splash and the dying psychic squid causing mass mind liquefaction), and making the world think they were being attacked by some space alien, rather than making Dr. Manhattan the enemy. Movie version was quite a nice twist.

    Killing the people has never been proven to be a very effective way to stop a rogue government, if the government is not physically impacted by random civilians getting killed, however many of them are killed. But in Watchmen, he didn’t simply kill civilians - he faked a common threat that the governments would be afraid of to divert their attention. Space squids in the comics, Dr. Manhattan going biblical in the movie. Depends how hard the governments buy it. In the movie, Dr. Manhattan siding with that idea means he could probably sell it well enough to make it believable - giving the world an ultimatum after someone else already pressed the button. Who knows about the squid version. The conclusion given in the comics / movie is that he was kinda right as long as Dr. Manhattan said screw it and supported it (mass slaughter notwithstanding, of course). The whole premise also does rely on the inevitability of shit hitting the fan, which… yeah, world with or without superpowers, it’s hard to reject that notion. But today? Who knows if some sort of walking god nuke just glassing Moscow, Washington, and a bunch of other big capitals would even be enough to curb down the delusions of our major fascist nazi nutcases, outside of actually vaporizing the entirety of their armies, including the fascists in chief themselves in all countries.






  • Rebirth lays the groundwork for Shinra starting a world war to generate more lifestream material (anguish of war victims) and “replenish the planet” so that they can pump out more Mako, it seems to be going pretty hardcore about Shinra being pure casual evil ultra imperialist capitalist, with the side of growing religious takeover with who believes or not in the Promised Land (and I forget what they call the huge materia in Rebirth - magister? Magnus?) as a land of infinite resource to sell as electricity. Scarlet salivating at the Weapons, literal harbingers of the end of the world, for the giant materia they’re made of is pretty on point.

    Also they made massive efforts on the worldbuilding with all regions each having their History dominated by their local war with Shinra. I’m eager to get Wutai and the revamp from the war in Crisis Core, and possible new mentions of the new Ever Crisis stuff like Rhadore and that recent pre-Wutai place. Shinra has been going from cartoon villains in the OG to openly pure evil of mankind.


  • Git gud or leave but no complaining allowed okay bud. No, the difficulty being too high is not a different complaint, it’s exactly what we’re talking about. The AI, the room setups and somehow every bug being placed exactly where you’re jumping, the runbacks, getting killed in 3 hits half of the time even though you have 5 HP, getting juggled to death into a spike trap or lava as soon as the first hit despite requiring 3 hits to die despite having 5 HP, getting hit when you’re healing and losing all of it, every single stupidest bug requiring at least 2 or 3 hits to kill and somehow up to 6 or 8 for the bigger ones when they all dodge everything and you have garbage range, anything that flies especially, constant pixel perfect coordination in your jumps, the need to be alert 100% of the time between environment traps and enemies and always have the perfect speedrun strat, on top of the resource management, this is all one complaint. It’s artificially way too hard and there is zero learning curve and no way to tune it down, and it would be less of a problem if you didn’t lose all the resources you were collecting for an hour of doing that loop. Take off some of those or loosen some positioning and it’s already much less stressful - literally any one mod is a big help already (no 2HP damage, respawn near your coccoon…) It’s ruthless, it allows zero second of paying a little less attention, it’s on purpose, and it is not the player’s fault for not running back to a string station that is not marked anywhere. This is not a healthy game to play, and it shouldn’t be justified by saying it’s for players who want to get very good at every single screen of it and no one else.

    You want to buy Shakra’s map? Too bad, that room is empty now for some reason, and you have no idea where to find the map now, you don’t know Shakra comes back to the shop area and can be called with that ring, and since you HAVE NO MAP you don’t even know where to go at all anyway. Benches and bellways, same, you CAN’T GO BACK or safely rest and create a checkpoint until you have the funds to even unlock them, at which point getting your beads stringed becomes useless because you just spent them. See that mask shard and/or the simple key and you think it’d be nice to buy in your first couple hours? Your fault for not wanting to keep going back and forth between the docks and the shop to make a string, on top of going back and forth to the farming room for an hour at 5 to 15 beads per run in lava for the Deep Docks, so that’s 500 rosaries gone the second time in a row some stupid bug won’t get out of the way but also reads your every input to dodge every single time you even look at them. And even the first time you die, if you had no bench close by and no map, good luck even getting your coccoon back. What I’ve learned is to completely ignore those big stashes and strings of free rosaries because it’s all bait that you’ll lose in a minute and then permanently the next minute (that Greymoor bird house trap and Moorwing are NOT in the refund window). And learning that didn’t make the experience any better. That’s the difficulty problem we’re talking about, these are not two separate things, it’s literally the whole game. On its own, dying repeatedly is not such a big deal if all you have to do is redo that one jump or even that one series of 15 perfect jumps (fucking Karnak), other Metroidvanias do that too and they’re not awful. It’s everything around it and the permanent pressure.

    This game’s trap is that people who played the newer Metroid or Prince of Persia think dying repeatedly in a lengthy, very hard bounce-and-dash maze is not a huge deal breaker even if this one ramps it up to “every screen is a constant challenge”, but they don’t know they should also have played Dark Souls and some other roguelikes first.


  • Not a lot of those in a 5 screen run back, I just need one more try to kill that boss anyway, I swear. Oh shit, it has another move shit he’s juggling 3 HP off me at once aaaand I’m dead again.

    And that’s not counting the unexpected “oops you’re locked now, fight these 5 waves of enemies, also your coccoon is locked in that room too, good luck getting your shit back” on your way to anywhere. If that’s your first time playing the game, it takes a bit to pick up on how cruel the game is and to start thinking about how to handle that. I’m not talking about people who already know the game here. That’s not on me, no.








  • I can’t believe we haven’t learned anything since “it’s about ethics in games journalism”. “It’s about monetization in AAA games” now, apparently.

    I totally agree that there has been a hate campaign about DEI right-wing complains, but there’s two subjects that came to head at the same time here because it was on the same big title:

    Star Wars Outlaw and AC Shadows had the same business model, Star Wars showed that it failed, and Ubisoft got spooked and said they’d have another look at the monetization model for AC. People did get pissed at both games when their business models with passes and editions everywhere were revealed.

    It’s just that AC also had at the same time the matter of racist and misogynist hate because of the protagonists. I don’t think this happened on Star Wars, and the fact that it failed too shows that it isn’t the only complain people are having against Ubisoft.

    Apparently the monetization guy is stepping on the minority hate campaign subject, he’s the one conflating the two problems here just because his job title. We shouldn’t forget that Ubisoft did pull an infuriating and deplorable stunt with that monetization model.