alaphic

Yeah, because - as everyone clearly knows - one’s propensity to enjoy sucking cock can be determined directly from their profile picture on any given social media site.

Brilliant.

You know what they say: Go to Heaven for the atmosphere, go to Hell for the company

Never speak to me or my son ever again.

You mean, like… Corn?!?!

Vegetable soup (with corn) has entered the chat

And my point stands.

Also, you and your strict interpretation of ‘cereal’ have room to talk right after lecturing me about arbitrary categorizations… Sounds like someone needs to take their own advice, eh? 😋🙃

Two girls one cup.

There, now we’ve both named disgusting, shitty things people have done for money 🙃

This reads like a list of Stephen Miller’s pickup lines…

Until one day, when you’re eating soup and innocently toss in some croutons, only to realize that what you’re eating is essentially cereal: savory edition, which you find so inexplicably disgusting that you can’t even stomach the thought of regular cereal for a depressing amount of time

I mean, I can see what they were going for here, sure… But this probably had to have - what - likev a half dozen or so (allegedly ⁷functioning) adults review all of this, likely discuss it amongst themselves to boot… Anyway, all of that and still - yadda yadda yadda - we make it through all of that without a single motherfucker being like, “So, ya don’t think the name will attract any… undesirable elements for a care center or anything like that?”

Hey, hey, hey… That’s fucked up; you can’t just call someone a ‘genocider’ lile thaf…

It’s genocid*-ist*

Plus, as an added bonus, you don’t need a flashlight ever again because of the pale green glow you emit afterwards.

Source: Every cartoon from my childhood

Just think of all the energy you’d have! 🤯

Sir, this is a Wendy’s.

Ok, I know it’s been awhile since I’ve been on reddit (I left for good when they nixed clients), but has it changed drastically or something? Cuz this doesn’t even make sense to me

That’s some Olympic gold level mental gymnastics

Look, I didn’t want to have to be the one to say this, but since no one else is apparently going to: That toddler looks rough af bro… I mean, basically like a nearly grown ass man.

Hopefully they land on their face and you can get it some of that sweet, sweet reconstructive surgery so it isn’t fuck ugly all its life.

Obviously, you look fine and stuff tho, OP. Don’t consider my words a poor reflection upon your semen/egg quality. I’m sure they get it from their other parent. Now, let’s move on before anyone points out that, best case scenario, I’ve now creepy ass things

Bro, carrots to chicken? Really? You literally had anything to anything to choose from here - while attempting to literally one-up a god, mind - sky’s the limit and everything, and that’s what you settle on?

Not rocks into gold, sand into heroin, water into a 40 year old scotch, pee into milkshakes; nah, that’d be fuckin lame compared to carrots into motherfuckin chicken! I mean, I get it, kinda, cuz I’m not into carrots and would prefer chicken in its place 100% of the time, but… I’m just sayin, compared to some of the possibilities that’s like mid at best, prolly more like a sidegrade if we’re being honest.

Oooh, every other flavor Starburst into pink! Boom. Talk about unlimited cosmic power

Well… In light of this thread, I’m certainly not gonna be able to look at Gamepass the same way now, at least…

dat haptic fredback

rumble rumble

My former girlfriend’s vagina is an Xbox to me…

This is the comment I came here for

Yes.